Still surprises now and then... it keeps the hope

This past week with Darrin out sick a few days, his work load very heavy with deadlines for building designs due, etc. it was not the best for me heading out for two days. I think an already taxed man was put under more pressure than he expected in my absence. During last week we experienced Beckett do something he hasn't for a spell. He was peeing through the night in the house even though I would take him out at midnight and sometimes later. Standing here and there with the night winds blowing up my coat didn't put me in the best of humor at 12ish I'll tell you. It wasn't usual for where he had come from, so we need to fix this somehow! If only we could understand what causes the backstep. On Saturday spent 11 hours painting the apartment building hallway (It is five different paints and the trim is fine detail so it took longer than I expected) and at the end of the day I was exhausted and obviously my immune system was down and out because I became ill fairly quickly. Since Darrin was working, Beckett wasn't sure what the heck was going on. Here I was with paint and roller and such but I never left the house. He is used to us getting things together and then exiting. Perhaps he thought I couldn't find my way out. LOL The next day, Sunday, I was sick. I hoped it's from the drywall dust and not the flu! Either way, I was down and out and in a lot of pain, chills, and upset stomach. The whole deal! The funny thing is that because Darrin was off to work again, I had solo time with Beckett and truly dreaded the thought of standing for what seemed like hours while Beckett got his fill of smells and local activity before he decided to pee. Instead of whining about it I decided to head out to pick up my granddaughter. If I had to go out, I was going to make the most of it. Beckett came with me and spent the morning with us. After a few hours I had zero energy and headed back to the apartment with Isabelle and Beckett in tow. He wasn't too comfortable with her being in the apartment but I couldn't help it and couldn't take Isabelle back until 12:30 as I had agreed when picking her up. It was a timing thing for when her mom was back. Instead we settled in by watching cartoons on the sofa. Beckett was very interested in why this stranger was cuddling with me. It really wasn't necessarily cuddling, I was too tired to sit up. He didn't take his eyes off us and now and then would do his growl/whine sound like as if to say "is she still here?" After taking Isabelle back to her mom's, I came back to the apartment and laid out on the sofa again to await the people coming to view the middle apartment between 1 and 3. I honestly would have cancelled it if I had two clues about me. Anyway, I showed the apartment at 1 to a nice lady, but while I was in the hallway speaking to her, Beckett was pacing up and down our stairs in the apartment because he could hear our voices. Once again he didn't know what the heck was going on and why was I loitering. I explained to the lady that he was a miller rescue and tended to be a little nervous. I avoided introducing them since everyone I happen to present him to lately gets the gift of a nervous poop left behind! Why tempt fate when I knew what the odds were and honestly felt like I was going to toss my cookies as well. LOL The next appointment didn't show until 2 so i did the 'sofa' time while waiting her arrival. Odd thing, Beckett jumped up on the sofa and laid next to me. I wasn't too aware of much but did register that what was happening was new. Did the little guy actually care about me enough to try and comfort me... or.. was he smelling death and wanted to be first in line once I passed over!! I think I would have been safe because his dish still had food in it. :P The second, and then the third set of viewers showed before 3 so I was exhausted after the last left and retired to my bed with a cold cloth over my eyes to try and relieve the pain. As I lay in the fetal position, Beckett jumped up on the bed, for the first time ever, and cuddled in against my stomach. I had my cell phone with me and snapped a picture because Darrin would never have believed it. I think this little doggie actually was trying to comfort me and not attempting to than drive me nuts when I was too weak to tell him to get off the bed. LOL He just may care after all. Just so you know, I am NOT a person who lets a dog sleep in the bed with him. I survived 3 or 4 years with the last dog having to do that due to his blindness and health condition so ... no more. In Beckett's situation I was so pleased that he showed any sort of attachment that I allowed it. I may regret it later on but if this is what it takes to build the bond, I'll work through it and correct him later on once he's more secure. The picture at the top of this entry is the picture of him actually sitting on the bed. Don't say anything about getting my hand in the way.. I'm surprised I actually got the picture.. or even thought to take a picture. The phone was next to me in case I had to dial 911.
Here is Beckett on the farm checking out the horses with me for the first time. I didn't get it downloaded from my Blackberry until today. I thought better late than never for posting.

It's a tough go with only one person

Hi to anyone who is still stopping in now and then to check on things with Beckett. He's doing well but I think we've hit the wall for things he will take on with heart and the things he will not attempt because he doesn't know what to do. It is evident in the training he adheres to and the work he will do when he has to versus when he feels he has not choice to do. In my books, a dog needs to "want" to please the master of the house and not because he feels he has to or be punished. That is the true turning point. In my case, it was very clear early on that even though you couldn't stuff Beckett into a holding kennel without sedating him heavily, he will readily hop into the back seat of the car because he likes to be there. He loves sitting in the back driving to new places and old while alternating from window to window to poke his head out. I'm sure he thinks that just approaching the window makes it open. LOL we watch for him and will lower the windows on the side he nears while closing the opposite. When you look into the mirror your see him actually enjoying the wind in his face. This is what I mean by Want versus Must. I want Beckett to want to have us pet him because he likes it and not because I have cornered or made him come to me. With another dog getting attention, he does look to 'want' to have it but when we get home he goes back to his growling state. This week I planted the seed of finding Beckett a companion dog. I do have the pup on order for the fall and my hopes that there is a 'normal' dog out there needing a loving home before the fall is just that, a hope. I know that these dogs are great family pets and the odds of me finding another dog to balance Beckett is fairly slim. Then again, finding Beckett was pretty slim too. It would be a crying shame to have him for a year and then discover that he can't or won't ever go to that point where he is a great dog that is part of the family. Right now, as much as I think of this little guy, I mentally have him just at the edge of my heart because I know he is the one who will make the decision or not to be part of the family based on his ability to adjust. On our side... OMG.. we are adjusting much more than we had thought we could. Still searching for that magic switch that lights up Beckett's life.

March 14th week, it's never just another week!

Ah, the last week before "Spring" and what looks like a promising week of events ended yet again with an episode that sets us all back to square one... or maybe it just feels that way.

Good points of the week..car rides and head stuck out the windows, dog play with different toys, walking (AKA Bekka-Heel) next to me on command, meeting new people without dogs on the sidewalk, meeting new people with dogs without warning, seeing horses (big dogs who obviously don't play), seeing a bicycle for the first time, and most appreciated from my point of view, less bio-messing in the house (never to be confused with Beckett-mess).

Poor point from the week.. back to being scared and growling a lot, not liking the 'drying time"after being out in the rain, dropping logs around new people who happen to talk to him on the sidewalk, and a very bad bite on Darrin's thumb.... loss of attachment from Darrin because he is now afraid Beckett will bite again.

Quite the mixed bag of ups and downs. For some reason the week started out well enough but Beckett did have a 'distance' in his approach to us by Tuesday evening. As always, you can't MAKE him change his attitude, you can only make sure he doesn't get more distance between you through is actions. It is extremely difficult to come home several times a day, deal with life's stressors, and not have it get to you now and then. The weather also plays a huge part in how things transpire along the way. To think it doesn't means you're going to be in for a very rude awakening. One night this week Darrin ended up taking Beckett out for a walk and it was pouring. Upon returning, Darrin stopped at the lower landing and was about to dry Beckett off, which I had been doing all week because of the mud, only this time Beckett turned on Darrin and bit his thumb. It was a sever bite and ended up with four deep punctures and a lot of blood. We managed to get the bleeding stopped and arrested any swelling, but the deed had been done. The dog that wouldn't bite, or so we thought, bit.

At first I tried to make the normal excuses for Beckett such as, Darrin must have approached him from the wrong angle, he must have moved too fast, maybe the drying glove (we know he doesn't like towels over his head) touched him in the wrong way, etc. It was a bite, brought on by Beckett's fear/anxiety. Until now he would always allow us to pick him up, do different things and growl or freeze but he never bit. Darrin on the other hand has lost confidence in Beckett's 'comfort' with us and I can see the withdrawal from physically handling Beckett. This is going to take a bit of work to mend this fence.

This weekend hasn't been the best for Darrin, his thumb is still sore, he has a bad cold, and the weather is cold. I've sort of been running all interference so he doesn't have to contend with Beckett's growling disapproval or distance stance he puts out when he's not a happy camper. I don't need the synergy of two negatives being more that the sum of the two individuals. It's easier to just keep them apart until things improve.

The weekend hasn't been too bad for Beckett and myself. As always, the more time he spends with me and out of the apartment the better he seems to be. Getting together with other dogs or riding in the car seems to remove the edge from Beckett so as much as I can, we do that.

The horses were a new thing today. Although I had taken Beckett out to the farm a few times, it was the first time I took him down to be around the horses. Lucky for Beckett, they're used to Sadie, the family's chocolate lab so another dog didn't seem to throw them off much. They were more interested in who the new dog was and came over to the fence to see him pretty quickly.

At first I took him into the corral but when it became apparent that they were going to come investigate the new dog on the property and Beckett couldn't be released from his lead, I had to exit the corral before they came in from the outter field. It was fine because as we got outside the gate, they were right there with their heads over the fence.

Now that it's Sunday evening, we've had our hour walk through down-town mostly to get used to new places, learn to heel when I give the command, and most importantly, to empty out his bowels before the long night! He's doing well, but why test fate when you don't need to! Always hedge your bet and prepare for success. Oh by the way, if you want to see a dog in bliss, leave a basket of dirty laundry out over night. What you find in the morning is a a content little doggy laying all over your stuff like it was his treasure.

yoyo doggyo... time to change approach

We'll have to take the good with the bad on this past week. As for the weekend, we had a good day and then we had a bad day for the little guy. Thank GAWD he's cute and we're superficial!

I'm only joking... he's not that cute!

Really, it was indeed a weekend of mental ups and downs for us. One minute Beckett is fine then a 1/2 hour later he is doing his growling thing and staying clear of us. Then there are the messes. He was great all week, then without reason, awful all at once.

It's now Tuesday morning. Last night I had someone booked to come look at my apartment for the sublet over the summer period while we are living in the summer house. Since she was showing up at 6;30 it gave me nearly an hour and a bit to clean. With the spring mud session on the weekend the stairway treads were muddy looking again and an awful first impression. So, we scrubbed the apartment floors, cleaned the bathroom, tidied, and then I scrubbed all of the stairs down to the street level.

As I was doing this Darrin was cleaning too and preparing supper. Once I was done, there was still 15 minutes to spare. After eating, I even went so far as to spritz the apartment with a great air freshener we bought a while ago. It smells like you're baking cookies. So, after eating Darrin grabbed his gym bag and off he went and it was just Beckett and myself. Kimberly showed up around 20 to 7 with her son to look at the apartment.

I let them in and as they came into the main area of the apartment, Beckett spotted them and went into high stress. He was good for a spell but when I was walking them through the apartment he was zipping here and there trying to keep the maximum amount of distance between them and him. Every once in a while he'd dart behind me to avoid being between us.

Then, it happened, I was in the kitchen speaking with Kimberly about the summer and how great it is to be on the waterfront with the events just up the street and the water view, etc. Beckett circled me pooped a protective circle in somewhat of a Stonehenge layout and then peed in the centre before heading back to his bed in the living room. Let's just say, at that point I was at a loss to defend his actions but came back with a smart ass comment about it smelling like someone just pooped out a cookie! Kimberly broke out in a laughter while saying she fully understood the situation and wasn't put off at all.

Phew.. that was close! Literally and figuratively.

After cleaning that up, I knelt down and leaned against the cupboards. Beckett came over and slid up beside me and put his head up under my arm and on my lap as if he wanted me to protect him from the two strangers. It was the first time he had ever done that as well. That wasn't the end of it for the night. Around 11:00 he and I were in the living room and he hopped up on the sofa and laid down next to me. I mean right NEXT to me. Not at the other end of the sofa which was always the nearest we could sit with him. He then laid there while I pet his head for a spell.

At midnight we went out and he did his business, came back in, then 15 minutes later he went off to the kitchen, and peed against the stove! I thought it was the perfect time to instill the training at the scene of the crime and put his short leash on him and walked him immediately to the stove where he had just sped away from. As I cleaned it up, I was firm but not mean about it being a NO item. It was then that I realized that this training had better hold until today because I just went through the last of the paper towel in the house. LOL Nothing instills anxiety in us more than being out of paper towels these days.

New tricks for the old dog...

It's Sunday night, Darrin is working on a client's house design, I'm checking out my online email and Beckett is sprawled out over his blanket about a foot or so from me... sound asleep.

Darrin and I have agreed that we're going to start the discipline training for getting Beckett to go outside to use the bathroom. Both of us figure it is time and since he has no problem being hooked on for going out, it's time to create the ability to tell us he needs to go out. Most of the week Beckett was great but on Friday night he pooped and peed in the apartment after having gone out at 12:30 at night with me! It's time to up the training.

This week Beckett and I have been having this 'situation' happening when we came to the corner of the apartment building. He would run ahead, climb up into the plant area and start reverse his body and start pulling on the lead like i was zapping him with a cow-prod. All I managed to do was avoid the corner to try and remove the behaviour. It didn't work because the last time I went out yesterday he did the same thing. I can't have him out of control so both Darrin and I agreed that it's time for his short-lead training time.

There was a bit of a fight to begin with and we can't have anyone walking behind us, but Beckett walks by my side (albeit the right side and not my left)! He is definitely a quick study, when there isn't a fear factor involved. If there is a fear factor, then he's a complete pile of crazy covered with fluffy fur!

Another big week gone by. Beckett spent a day in my office, went most of the week without messing in the house, learned to walk on a short lead, and learned to get his muddy feet cleaned off... after much work at the foot thingie! I scrubbed the stairwell on Thursday night and now it's worse than it has been all winter. Meh... I'll scrub again tomorrow night.

Take a doggie to work day!!

It's March 10, 2011 and today is Taking Beckett to work day! Since most of the staff are away on site work with clients, I thought it was much more sensible to just take him into work with me. Lisa and Kimberly are the only other staff in-house so they're great about it.

You have to remember that Beckett now runs to the door when we are going out because he wants to come with us and going into strange places isn't one of his strengths yet. My office is located on the top floor of an old brick building and the stairs are an Open concept so getting him up here was a worry. I sometimes worry too much! He ran along side me all the way up. He came through the door without hesitation and even the noise of the alarm system before disarming didn't make him drop a log.

We had 5 minutes to scope out the place together before Lisa came in. Lisa came in, said awwe he's so cute... THEN he dropped some logs on the carpet. First impressions are always soooo important! I just told Lisa she forgot her make-up. LOL I'm sure the black eye will go away in a week's time. Just joking.. no bruise is showing.

On Tuesday, Beckett when with Darrin on the road for meetings all day. Apparently Beckett was great to sit in the car during the meeting and between meetings Darrin said he did his business and wasn't a problem at all. There was also copious amounts of Beckett licking Darrin's ear and neck from the back seat along the way too.

We are now seeing a dog on the mend. I have to say it is these moments that help erase the not so great moments.

Last evening Darrin and I were watching TV and Beckett was curled up on the floor about a foot away from us. We started talking about how he came to us and both realized that we had the same thoughts run through our heads when Garin pull open her truck door and presented Beckett for the first time. "What the hell did we get ourselves into?" was one initial thought that didn't make it to our lips and the second was "I just need him (fill in the name Doug or Darrin..) to say one word about this not being what we were ready for ... and I'm outta here!

I'm so glad we didn't go with our gut instincts to flee when we first met him. For the rest of you, I hope you don't think little of me for saying that but REALLY... his first impression is AWFUL! Thank gawd these dogs are beyond cute.

The more time Beckett spends with us, and I mean each day, the more noticeable is the reduction of his growling. Maybe this ain't so bad.

Great Weekend... here and there

This was a good weekend on a few fronts with Beckett and his 'progression'. He has made great strides with coming when he's called for going outside and when he's outside he is, as we've mentioned before, a different dog.


This past week was a rough one because he seemed have no trauma in his life and yet, he was messing here and there without cause. Now there is a little issues with him and being down on the landing with two of us there. When both Darrin and I are on the landing, you can't delay clipping on to him and getting him outside. It has to be a fluid movement (gawd that's a bad pun after his reaction on Saturday) and out the door before he has too much time to think about it.


Of course, it doesn't help when the two of you are trying to speed things along and you get snappy with each other along the way. It's funny now but on Saturday it wasn't during the poop fest and liquid release on the steps. Darrin while trying to get Beckett out of there because of the situation tried to point out the number of messes and their exact location, I on the other hand was not really caring about the messes left but the quantity yet to be distributed and Darrin and I got snappy at each other, which didn't help the mood of the evening's plan for a movie.


On Saturday, I decided I owed Darrin a "Beckett Brake" for the day and took Beckett along with me and Granddaughter Isabelle. Beckett made an instant friend when Isabelle decided to share pieces of her breakfast sandwich. As I mentioned before Beckett is now a car hound. He absolutley loves to go in the car. Best of all, he is fantastic in the car! You'd swear he was raised his whole life with car travel. This is the same dog that had to get on the floor of the front seat of a car and slide out on his belly because he couldn't touch the ground and have his feet still touching the car's interior. Now we say "Car" shake the car keys and open the door. He's up in the back seat before you can say it twice. LOL


He doesn't go crazy when another dog is in the car with him nor does he go into a barking frenzy when another dog is near. Big plus points for that!!


Anyway, he went with us out to see the horses but unfortunately it was too cold and dirty to take him out of the car. I think I'll wait until I know I can bath him before I release him into a barnyard.


Today he was beyond our wildest expectations. We went to Darrin's parent's house to remove some of the excess snow from their roof, and thus eliminate the snow dams that cause so much damage. Beckett was not happy being left in the car when his playmate Chance was playing in the snow just a few feet away. After a spell Darrin went and got Beckett out of the car so he could play... and play they did. Beckett went totally crazy with play. Poor Chance must have felt like he'd been coupled up with an HDHD kid on a sugar high! Then after when lunch was ready we were going to put Beckett back in the car but thought we'd give him a try in the house with the other three dogs. it was here that Beckett amazed us. We stuck the 4 ft lead on him and let him loose in the house. He became so comfortable he was following Chance around, through small openings around all of us. he became so comfortable that Darrin's dad just walked up and bent over and started scratching both sides of Beckett's face. There was no flinching, backing up, growling .... nonthing except a little dog enjoying the attention. This continued the whole time he was in the house with the other dogs. All four dogs got along as if they had been raised together.

Take what we can get

It is Thursday and so far, no drama again this week. Beckett is a bit more settled. Today I advanced the 'trust' limit a bit. I left the hall doors open ( but not the street level door) and called Beckett to go for a walk. (I'm going to try and video him for this posting to show you his actions)
He did his chatter as he rushed by me and out the apartment door and down the stairs to the street level door. I stayed on the second floor and called him back up.

He did his whine/growl thing and paced up and down the stairway by the sound of it and eventually got the point that in order to go out he needed his lead on and reluctantly came back up to the middle floor and in the door to be clipped on. It took a bit of patience on both our behalves but it worked through. I'll try it again tonight to see how it works. My objective is to have him come when he is called regardless of where he is in order to get clipped on. I'm doing the same thing with the car.

In the case of the car, Beckett is now associating it with positive experiences (nothing like being neutered to set you off on the wrong foot I'll say!) and I am holding up my car keys and jingling them when I say Car. I will extend this to be just outside the car, now that he easily jumps in and out on command. If Darrin and I can have him come to jingling keys/name or something common, to be clipped on, then it will help with his trust factor and allow us to take him for walks on the property without the issue of his lead always limiting his experiences.

There is still the odd Pee thing happening and I'm now using the word "no" when he shouldn't be doing something and he is catching on. He doesn't like it when he can't have the clothes from the hamper and there is just something unsettling about having the crotch chewed out of my underwear thank you very much. The symbolism there gives me the shivers!

There is one more thing he has caught on to. It's the "I'm just so cute you can't tell me no" approach. He is learning that if he poses at the end of the carpet and just moves his eyes, that we will melt into babbling baby-talk people and toss him goodies. Of course he just as quickly goes back into his elusive growling talk stance like we're threatening him... although a minute before he was letting you pet him. Now you know why this one is titled, "Take what we can get".

It's Friday, I have the afternoon run for a change. Darrin has a meeting so I'll be the one going home. Apparently Beckett had already gone in the apartment before Darrin got there this morning. I think next week we will start to do the praise vs non-praise training. He needs to know when something is not acceptable. First thing we need to figure out, is how to have the non-praise recognized without him feeling threatened. The mild tone of 'No' may be good enough but I'll see how he reacts on something mild. Darrin also had his first experience with Beckett turning himself inside out at the particular point of the walking route. I'm not sure what it is but he freaks out there and we even had a negative experience where he went into 'crazy' mode of escape at all costs action. There isn't a reason for it but it exists and so I avoid that corner to eliminate the negative experience of going for walks. He doesn't do it when approaching the same spot from the reverse direction. Weird huh?

Friday night.... had a major slip back for Beckett. We came home and not only did he not come back up the stairs he lost control of his bodily functions and had quite the mess on the stairs and on the landing. We're not sure what triggered it but, yup... another little setback. He seems okay now but that isn't a guarantee. sigh.